This can't be good
by Dark Angel and Dark Star
Summary: Of course nothing is ever good when the 2p hetalia characters are present right? But for poor Arthur it's just a matter of what he's going to do with Oliver who seems to like knives, and cupcakes a lot. In the end it's all Alfred's fault. Rate T for language, and violence. I do not own anything except my story its plot and cetera


This was the last thing he needed. Arthur Kirkland never felt so frustrated in his entire life. "Then why the bloody hell did you call me!?" He yelled at Alfred.

Alfred smiled widely as he replied; "Because the hero needs a sidekick!" He exclaimed as if it explained everything.

Arthur glared at Alfred furiously. "I'm going home." He snapped. He turned around after shooting a crisply glare at the American.

"Wait!" Alfred exclaimed. "I.. do need your help." He rubbed his arm nervously, his smile faltering.

Arthur crossed his arms aggravated. "Then tell me you idiot." He grumbled. Alfred opened a door next to him announcing loudly that someone could come out. Arthur tensed glancing at what seemed to be his twisted reflection. Only there was no mirror.

"Hello." He greeted. He had a ridiculous pink dress shirt, and purple vest. His blue eyes seemed distant, and Arthur noticed the blue bow tie around his neck. "I'm Oliver." He held out a tray. Would you like a cupcake?"

Arthur took the cupcake. He Took a bite, and found it surprisingly delicious. "This taste splendid."

Oliver smiled widely, his shaggy blonde hair falling over his eyes. "Thank you." Oliver smiled widely as Alfred quickly shove the cupcakes into his mouth.

"Be careful porkchop, you're looking fatter." The strong New York accent came from in the stiffened. This man looked almost exactly like Alfred. The only differences were that everything he wore was a darker shade, he had sunglasses perched on top of his head, and his reddish brown hair. "Who's eyebrows over there?" He asked Oliver.

"Excuse me?" Arthur snapped offended.

"Allen, this is Arthur, you know the one Alfred told us about?" Oliver reminded.

Allen rolled his eyes. "Yes because I definitely care about what that fat nyo said." Allen replied dryly. Oliver frowned.

"Aren't they cool?" Alfred was totally oblivious to Allen's rude remarks. Arthur looked at Alfred in disbelief. Before he could respond he heard Allen shout,

"You bastard!" He growled. Oliver smiled innocently as Allen started bleeding from a cut on his cheek.

"You fucking liar, you cut me." Allan yelled holding tightly on a baseball bat that had nails driven into the top part.

Oliver smiled maliciously. "With what?" He set aside the now empty tray.

"That stupid knife you always carry around!" Allen yelled.

"Would you two shut up?" Someone grumbled. The four turned to see a frustrated man with messy blond hair, purple eyes, and a purple dress shirt. He rubbed the stubble on his chin that was even on his upper lip. He smoked a cigarette quietly standing next to Francis Bonnefroy. The man looked at the four looking stressed.

"Nevermind that, look at this horror! This french man isn't wearing anything glamorous!"

"You're too showy!" Allan, Alfred, and Arthur shouted. Oliver laughed. Francis eyed Oliver curiously.

"Who is he?"He glanced at Arthur, and Alfred.

"Sure act like I'm not even here." Allan huffed, pulling down his sunglasses.

Oliver walked up to Francis with a smile. "My name is Oliver Kirkland, pleased to meet you. I'm afraid I ran out of cupcakes though."

Francis looked shocked. "You can cook?"

"Way better than Arthur!" Alfred added. Arthur grumbled sulking to himself as the man next to Francis blew out smoke.

"Yes." Oliver replied with a chuckle.

Francis eyed his outfit happily. "Arthur you never told me you had such an attractive relative." Francis purred.

Arthur gaged. "You stupid romantic, I didn't even know him untill five minutes ago!"

Oliver smiled. "Arthur it's really no trouble at all." He assured. Alfred looked at the man smoking.

"What's your name?" He smiled widely despite the other's irritation.

"Francois Bonnefroy." He answered. Arthur was about to speak when Francis screamed. Allan pulled out the knife that was inches away from Oliver's head. A man who looked almost like a familiar Italian shouted; "knife fight!" He had a WWII army uniform, and blades between his fingers. He grinned widely his magenta eyes with red pupils lit up mischievously. He hurled the blade that were between his fingers at Oliver who dodge them without effort. The Dark haired Italian growled in frustration he was about to throw more knives untill Feliciano Vargas hugged him from behind with tears in his eyes.

"Pease Luciano, settle down, and eat some pasta!"

Luciano exclaimed frustrated. "Let me go you potato garlic loving bastard!" He growled. He stiffened when Oliver held a bloody kitchen knife under his chin.

"Luciano, you should stick to your indirect ways, like your brother." Oliver grinned from ear to ear.

Arthur stiffened. "Oliver?"

Oliver looked at Arthur from the corner of his eye. He put the blade away shrugging. "It would be rude of me to leave such a mess in someone's house." Luciano rolled his eyes.

Francois looked around. "Where did Allan go?" He asked finishing his cigarette. Arthur looked around. "Speaking of Americans, where is Alfred?" Arthur shook his head looking at Francis. "Would you stop looking like a love-sick puppy git." Arthur glared at Francis who smiled innocently.

"Oh Luciano~" a blonde with a similar curl to Lovino Vargas, who was also right behind him. Lovino groaned out a complaint.

"Feliciano get off that blood pasta loving bastard." He snapped. Feliciano looked at his brother.

"But big brother-"

"Big brother, nothing, get away from that knife throwing jack ass." He ordered. Ludwig appeared at his side.

"Feli Lovino is right." The almost six foot tall German pulled Feliciano off of Luciano.

"Thank God." Luciano muttered brushing off his clothes. Two red-eyed Germans came in afterward. They immediately recognized Gilbert Beilschimdt.

"Look West! I got your relative off the couch. Gilbert pointed to a red eyed man who look almost like Ludwig, except for the white striped T-Shirt, a dark brown jacket on his shoulders, the scars along his arms, and under his right eye. The man immediately colasped on Alfred's couch.

"Lutz get up." Ludwig barked. The german was unresponsive. Gilbert laugh elbowing his relative with long white hair tied back into a pony tail. His red eyes looked sad as he sighed.

"It is rather lively da?" Artur stiffened at the sound of the Russian's voice. Ivan stood in the doorway standing next to his counterpart. Feliciano, and Lovino looked slightly nervous at his presence. The man with dusty brown hair next to Ivan was starting to creep Arthur out with his stare. The man tugged on his black coat.

"I don't believe we know your name." Kiku came up behind the Russians.

" Nikolai Braginsky." He replied simply. Behind Kiku came an almost identical man. he had a black Japanese Imperial Navy, a purple cape, and white gloves. The red eyes held somewhat something of honor.

"Why is this all happening today." Germany pondered abandoning Lutz on the couch.

The blonde italian in the white suite smiled widely as he played with his orange scarf, lifting his orange sunglasses.

"Who cares, I just want some pasta with a lovely lady ciao!"

Lovino grabbed him by the collar screaming:"You're going nowhere you stupid cross dresser!"

"Big brother you could be a little nicer to Flavino." The Italian smiled before saying. "Pasta!"

"Say that one more time and I'll keep choking you!" Lovino shouted wrapping his hands around Feliciano's throat.

"Cut it out you two." Ludwig scolded them, pulling Lovino away from Feliciano.

"Feli don't upset your brother we have enough going on right now."Ludwig added.

Lovino's face twisted in displeased as he yelled. "I'll be damned before I let you call him that." Shoving a grenade between his teeth.

"Are you crazy?! you're going to get us killed!" Arthur, and Ludwig screamed. They all ran out of the house.

"What are we all doing outside?" Alfred said behind them just as they heard the explosion. Allan was right next to him staring at the flaming ruble of Alfred's house.

Oliver sighed. "I hate Italians. " he said bitterly. Several others nodded in agreement.

"I am so sorry." Feliciano said to Alfred with tears in his eyes.

"It's cool that's not even my house. "Alfred patted Feliciano on the head.

"Lovino!" The spanard Antonio Fernández Carriedo pulled rubble off of the Italian. "You are cleaning this mess up."

"Then hire a maid." Lovino snapped back. Antonio started pulling on Lovino's cheeks. Lovino pulled on Antonio's matador uniform in protest.

"Oh Lovino, you're always so cute."

"Son of a-" Lovino started untill Antonio started to play with his curl. "I hate you." Lovino muttered his face flushed. The spanish man smiled closing his eyes.

"Clean up this mess."

* * *

**a.n: so how do you like it? **

**Introductions are in order, I guess. Me and my sister both write our stories, though it's mostly me(star) I think you can tell the diffrence between our writing though, she loves el romance, or in german romantick. **

**Flame friendly**


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